Deal with it

There is a moment when failure shows up – when you realize it's at YOUR front door, in your life. In spite of everything you thought, planned and purposed – here it is… It’s devastating and brings fear with it.

I remember the first time I experienced failure. I thought “my life is over. I will be forever branded as a failure and there is just no hope.”

If you are breathing, you have experienced this as some point. It has taken me a good 20 years to realize that everyone will experience failure – it’s part of life.

However, the message from my parents, my educators, and even my Sunday school teacher was that my life has been setup to succeed. That was the point of life after all, right?

Failure was not an option – that would result in disappointing my parents and more importantly God.

I struggled to deal with that first failure – I couldn’t understand where did I go wrong, why did it go wrong – I wanted to hide away from the world.

Overcoming it took a good couple of years. It took the counsel of wise men and women and lot of time on my knees to learn the truth.

Here are 3 things I discovered on how to overcome failure, even the fear of failure…

1. First, start with understanding that failure is part of life.

Corinthians 10:13 says “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation He will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.”

2. Second, endure it (stay close to the Lord during this time- asking for wisdom and counsel)

Philippians 4:6-7 reminds us “do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

3. Third, identify and reflect on lessons learned. Failure is an opportunity to learn a lesson. Learn that lesson well. So when it comes around again, you know that you know what to do, how to move and how to deal with it.

Proverbs 24:16 says “For the righteous falls seven times and rises again, but the wicked stumble in times of calamity.”

Finally, give yourself permission to rest up and heal from this time so you can rise up and move forward in confidence and boldness.

Romans 5:3-5  encourages us with “More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.”

Failure is tough but with it comes value to last a lifetime and hope for a better future.

I agree with Dr. Robert Schuller –“ Let your hopes, not your hurts, shape your future. “    

Liëtte "Lee" Smith